I've always considered myself to be feminine. I wear dresses, lipgloss, and high heels. I flirt with boys, show off my curves and walk with my hips. I'm a total babe! ...at least I thought so until last night. I was hanging out with my friend Sweet P, when she shared a story about her one and only lesbian kiss that she shared with her sorority sister during college. My straight friend (who oddly joined a lesbian sorority at her university) clarified that if she were gay, she would prefer to be with a "butch" girl. She claimed that there is usually one masculine and one feminine person in a lesbian relationship, and she would be the feminine one.
 
I, on the other hand, said that I would prefer feminine girls, or "lipstick" lesbians, if you will. Therefore, I argued that there are lesbian couples in which both women can be feminine (or both masculine). Sweet P disagreed and cited Ellen and Portia, Cynthia Nixon and her manly girlfriend, and Melissa Etheridge and her ex-wife Tammy. I was dumfounded! My girl kiss and would-be "girlfriends" were feminine, so does that mean that I would be the butch one?! 

I thought back to the time when one of my college professors asked if I had always been a "tomboy". I was shocked and confused by her question! Then, I remembered that I have sported short hair-dos, participated in extreme sports, occasionally shopped in the boys section, and was often called "one of the guys" by my male friends. Damn it! I am the butch one! 

I think that I am more feminine now than I used to be, though I can definitely still hang with the boys. I'm still a bad-ass on a snowboard, but wear pink pants and girly, rhinestone-detailed boots. I wear lip gloss and high heels, but only if there's a reason. And I love watching football and drinking beer, but also love my yoga and a nice glass of wine. Hmmm, I wonder. If I were a lesbian, would I be "butch" or "lipstick"?

(Despite the physical disparity, I'd like to consider myself an Angelina Jolie-- a sexy bad-ass wanted by both men and women. ...Yeah, I know it's a bit of a stretch but whatever.)