I think I'm cursed. Have you ever seen the movie with Dane Cook, where every girl he hooks up with marries the next guy she meets? Well, I'm Dane Cook. It all started with my college boyfriend. After dating for a few years, I broke up with him when I transferred to a university in another state. He ended up marrying the rebound girl. Since then, I've dated a multitude of useless men. There have been a few that I genuinely liked, but those guys ultimately rejected me and subsequently started serious relationships with someone else within a year. For example:

  • A couple years ago, I had a brief relationship with a super cute guy who is still with the girl he started dating within weeks of our split. 
  • Just the other day, I learned on Facebook that one of my former flames recently knocked-up and subsequently married a girl he started dating after dumping me and moving to another state.  
  • A few days ago, I saw an almost boyfriend walking down the street, holding hands with a girl that I know through mutual friends. It wouldn't have been a big deal if she weren't a total butterface with the personality of Cookie Monster.
  • I recently learned that my least favorite ex is engaged to a stripper! That actually doesn't bother me 'cuz he was such a disaster! Actually, I feel bad for his fiancee (future ex-wife may be a more appropriate title). The jerk still calls me actually! (I never respond.) Honestly, I'd rather be single for all of eternity than be in her shoes. 
I explained this curse to someone, who offered two theories: Either I'm such a disaster that I've lowered the bar for the guys that I date which leads them to be easily impressed with the women they meet after me. Or, I'm so fabulous that these guys kick themselves in the butt for letting me get away, and don't want to repeat the same mistake of losing a good thing.  ...I choose to believe the latter theory.